Mama

Philip Roth said that when a man’s dying he wants his mama.  But if she’s not around any female will do.

He’s quite right.  Philip was a sharp guy.

I would add that there is something inherently perverse about human nature that makes us all want most the things that will kill us.  In my case, it’s been women that have killed me, but I cant live without one.

Ironically, I cant even have a gf because I would just take out the rage I feel for my ex-wife on her, and that relationship wouldn’t last long.

Besides, no woman with any class would want anything to do with a divorced man; that’s what people feel about such things around here.  That’s how conservative they are.

To ruin somebody you don’t have to beat them up, just shut off their options.  Pretty ingenious, that.

I picture myself in a trailer in Greenwood, Indiana in a few weeks, a trailer with a hole in the roof, no air conditioning, and windows that wont open.  Even if I survive the summer i’ll freeze to death in the winter.  Being an old man doesn’t give you much to care about.

Erblicken Sie den Mann.

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3 thoughts on “Mama

  1. I’m torn. On the one hand I want to convince you of all the good in the world to live for, but on the other, I can see where you’re coming from, and if I was in that situation myself I probably wouldn’t have much hope of life improving either. All I can say is that time does make a difference, even when we don’t want it to.

    • Thank you, Jenn. I know you care about me. The trouble is that my nemesis is determined to manipulate me into a position I could not survive in any case because she wants me dead so bad.

      • I’m really sorry that’s happening to you. That’s unfortunate and unfair.

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